"WE HAVE a communication problem." Often this is the response I hear when I ask a couple why they've come for marriage counseling. When I start questioning them about what this statement really means Francois Moubandje Switzerland Jersey , I get a variety of responses.
One woman blurted out that she is absolutely panicked about their financial future. Everything she reads predicts that she and her husband aren't going to have enough for retirement. On further questioning I find that she resents her husband because he's been in charge of their savings and somehow she thinks he should have saved more.
But she's not willing to bring up money because she doesn't want to cut her spending. She enjoys buying for her two grandchildren and shopping at craft shows. "This is my pleasure," she says. Her husband doesn't bring up money because he's aware of his wife's resentment. "I'm not getting into that hornet's nest," he says. Also Fabian Schar Switzerland Jersey , he's planning to retire at age 62 and he doesn't want those plans altered.
Feelings about their financial picture overshadow the marriage, and many topics have become taboo. They don't discuss vacations or retirement plans. They don't talk about needing a new roof or updating the kitchen. They don't freely show each other purchases they've made or discuss gifts they want to give to the children. Her resentment over lack of money also affects their sex life.
Although this couple say they have a communication problem, when you break it down Fabian Frei Switzerland Jersey , they really have a money problem that they are unwilling to tackle.
For some couples a communication problem really means the man won't talk. He shares little about what he thinks or feels. And when she talks, he's only mildly interested. It may be that the man is shy about revealing inner thoughts and simply needs to learn to speak out loud on what he's thinking. Or it may be that when he does share his thoughts, his wife interrupts or criticizes what he's saying. She must learn to let him talk without interrupting or critiquing.
A communication problem may also mean that the husband promises to come home at a certain hour and then doesn't do it. Or the wife fails to stick to her commitment to keep her belongings picked up. This "communication problem" could easily be solved if they would keep to their agreements. A communication problem may translate into the couple's being unwilling to discuss anything that has the potential for conflict. Both may be afraid of anger Eren Derdiyok Switzerland Jersey , so they only talk about surface issues. As a result, neither feels close or emotionally connected with the other.
When some couples say they have a communication problem, they mean they can't come to terms with a particular issue. They lack negotiation skills. For example Denis Zakaria Switzerland Jersey , he wants to go out with friends on the weekend and have a good time. She wants to stay home and have family time with the children. This couple could negotiate. Friday night is family night. Saturday night is for the two of them alone or with friends. Sunday is negotiable.
If you hear yourself or your mate say, "We have a communication problem," think about what this means in your relationship. Once you define the issue or issues that underlie this statement Breel Embolo Switzerland Jersey , you'll be able to tackle the true problem.
Public transport operators who already use passenger surveys may not fully appreciate the multiple benefits that surveys can bring. Not only are surveys an efficient method of market research that will help identify areas of passenger dissatisfaction, they are also perfect for measuring the effects of improvements and can, at the same time Blerim Dzemaili Switzerland Jersey , help promote new initiatives to customers using the service.
Establishing a Starting Point
When embarking on any change management programme it is always good practice to establish a base line before any changes are made. This baseline survey can serve four purposes, it will:
? allow the proper targeting of investment
? allow measurement of the effect of change
? assist in the moral of those implementing change
? ensure that new issues are kept separate from the original plan and budget
Targeting Investment
There are many areas of any public transport system that can cause passenger dissatisfaction all of which need to be monitored to ensure that the service being provided meets, and where possible Admir Mehmedi Switzerland Jersey , exceeds, performance level targets.
Issues that can be of concern to passenger include:
- safety and security - punctuality - fares and ticket types - capacity and overcrowding - quality and design of vehicle - cleanliness - facilities at stations and terminals - facilities for passengers with disabilities
Often limited resources and budgets means that investment needs to be carefully planned and properly targeted.
Passenger surveys allow operators to identify those areas that are of most concern to their customers. Through the analysis of passenger feedback the operator will be able to ensure that their improvement and investment plans are inline with passenger demands and concerns. Issues can be classified into high and low priority, as well as long and short term plans.
Some capital investment such as the building of new terminals Yann Sommer Switzerland Jersey , runways, laying new track or upgrading air traffic control or rail signalling equipment may take years to implement. However, the initial survey is also likely to identify some high profile areas that can be implemented almost immediately at a relative low cost.
Measuring Change
From having established a comprehensive programme from an initial survey the objectives for running periodic surveys are twofold.
One objective will be to ensure that the changes and initiatives that are implemented have been effective in addressing passenger issues. A second objective will be to promote and advertise the initiatives that have been implemented and also inform and educate passengers of ongoing improvements and future plans.